Book a Platform Assessment.
A 30-minute session with a senior K8s engineer — not a sales call. Bring your cluster topology, pain points, and the tools you're trying to consolidate. Leave with a written platform brief in 48 hours.
~90 seconds now. A concrete platform brief back in 48 hours.
No black box. Here's the four data points we'll ask for, and the four things you walk away with — whether or not you ever buy anything from us.
Cluster size & cloud
Node count, region, EKS/GKE/AKS/self-managed, and whether you're multi-cluster. One line is fine.
Current stack
The tools you're running today — observability, GitOps, secrets, ingress, policy. Names, not narrative.
Top pain points
One to three incidents, toil, or decisions you're stuck on. We read these before the call.
What "fixed" looks like
A line on your success criteria — MTTR, cost, on-call burden, audit posture. Whatever you measure.
Platform brief
Written assessment of your current platform against production-readiness criteria, signed by the engineer who ran the session.
Cost model
Per-pod-hour pricing extrapolated to your workload footprint, with line-items you can paste into a finance review.
Migration sketch
Sequence of cutovers from your current stack to PsychoK, ordered by blast radius — including rollback checkpoints.
Reference topology
Sample GitOps repo, ArgoCD ApplicationSet, and chaos-experiment schedule sized for your cluster profile.
A short, signed note on what this call is — and isn't.
If you're a platform engineer or SRE lead, you've been burned by "assessment" calls that turned out to be a 30-minute pitch. We have too. So here's the deal, plainly:
The session is run by a senior engineer from our 87-person team — typically someone who has shipped K8s at Google, Spotify, or HashiCorp, or built one of our open-source repos (chaosk, argocd-precheck, k8s-cost-explorer). They will not have a deck. They will read the four data points you submit, ask sharp questions, and take notes. We record nothing.
By "qualified cluster" we mean any production environment running 50–500 nodes where incidents cost real money. We have customers below that floor (we'll still talk) and above it (we'll bring more engineers). There is no minimum spend, no procurement gate, and no "are you a decision-maker" screening.
You will leave the call with a written brief — not a quote, not a contract, not a follow-up cadence. The brief is yours to act on, ignore, or forward to your CTO. If you want to move forward, great. If you don't, we still want the brief to be useful. That's how we ended up as a G2 Leader three seasons running.
— The engineering team, PsychoK GmbH, Friedrichstraße 68, 10117 Berlin
Seven fields. One click. Slot this week.
Same terminal syntax as the hero. Your answers go to the engineer who'll run the session — not a CRM. We respond within 4 minutes 12 seconds, median.
What happens after you click submit.
The call is one milestone in a four-step arc. The deliverable is the written brief — the call is how we earn the right to write it.
-
01t = 0 · 4 minutes 12 seconds
Slot confirmation
Auto-receipt with calendar invite and the engineer's name. Mutual NDA countersigned on request, usually inside 30 minutes.
median first-response · 4m 12s -
02t = 24h · pre-read
Engineer reads your scope
The SRE assigned to your session reviews your stack, recent incidents, and pain points. They come prepared with three specific questions — not a checklist.
ex-Google · ex-Spotify · ex-HashiCorp -
03t = 24–48h · the session
30 minutes, no slides
A working session, not a pitch. We dig into your topology, name the parts of your stack that are doing the same job twice, and sketch the cutover shape.
avg · 30 min · no recording -
04t = +48h · the brief
Written platform brief
A four-section document: assessment, cost model, migration sketch, reference topology. Yours to keep, forward, or ignore. No expiry.
deliverable · written · 48h
The five questions SRE leads ask before they book.
Answered in the same blunt tone as the rest of the site. If you have a sixth, email [email protected] — a human replies.
01 Will I get stuck on a sales call after this?
No. There is no SDR queue, no nurture sequence, and no "checking in next quarter." After the session you receive the written brief. If you want to talk again, you book again. If you don't, we don't follow up.
02 What happens to the data I submit in the form?
Your four scoping answers go to the assigned engineer over an internal channel with end-to-end encryption at rest. After 30 days, the form payload is purged from the intake system and only an anonymized cluster-size bucket remains in aggregate analytics. We do not enrich, resell, or share.
03 Who actually runs the session?
A senior engineer from our 87-person team. Most have shipped K8s at Google, Spotify, or HashiCorp, or maintain one of our open-source repos (chaosk, argocd-precheck, k8s-cost-explorer). You see their name, their bio, and their calendar before the call.
04 Can you sign an NDA before I share cluster details?
Yes. Tick the "send a mutual NDA" box in the form and we'll countersign inside 30 minutes, median. We have a template that satisfies procurement at Plaid, Mercury, Ramp, Vanta, and Linear — but we'll redline yours if needed.
05 My stack isn't in your dropdown. Should I still book?
Book. The dropdowns cover ~90% of what we see; the other 10% is Rancher, OpenShift, Talos, k0s, Nomad-on-k8s, and a long tail of self-managed distros. Write what you actually run in the stack field — that's more useful than forcing a fit.